


frightening parallels

by hanorganaas



Series: The Father, The Son, and The Meathead Boyfriend [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Crack, Fights and Makeouts, Handcuffed Together, Humor, M/M, POV Outsider, The Force Awakens Kink Meme, The Shit Han has to deal with
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-09
Updated: 2016-01-09
Packaged: 2018-05-12 17:59:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5675326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hanorganaas/pseuds/hanorganaas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Han does manage to take his son off the Starkiller Base, unfortunately he is handcuffed to his companion and apparent "boyfriend" and has to deal with their bickering. Hilarity thus ensues</p>
            </blockquote>





	frightening parallels

**Author's Note:**

> Response to the following Prompt on the [TFA Kink Meme](https://tfa-kink.dreamwidth.org/1082.html?thread=1521978#cmt1521978):
> 
> Kylo/Hux, accidentally handcuffed together shenanigans ensue.

_I'm doing this for my wife, I am doing this for my wife_ , Han repeated in his head like a mantra as he kept his hands tightly on the controls of the falcon. It's enough he was freezing cold dodging lasers that tried to shoot him down. Now he his head was pounding at the noise.

But the moment he saw Ben....he grabbed him. Not realizing that he didn't just grab Ben aboard the ship....he grabbed one of the top ranking Generals from the First Order too. Apparently the two men got themselves cuffed to each other, Han didn't know how but he didn't have time to think about it when he brought both men on the Falcon.

At first he was proud of himself, even Finn who was helping Rey shoot with the ships weapons, noticed the proud grin on the former career criminals face as he dragged him both on the ship.

Of course not even ten minutes into the trip he began to regret it. The two men kept fighting, probably as loudly and violently as he and Leia used to do on a good day. 

"THIS IS JUST GREAT KYLO!" The boy who Ben called Hux roared, "if you weren't so focused on recapturing the girl....we wouldn't be in this position. In here in this Dingy old ship...WITH YOUR FATHER NO LESS!"

"Well maybe if you hired more competent Stormtroopers...." Ben roared back he was waving his arms in the air, Hux's cuffed arm was raised with it. "I WOULDN'T HAVE TO CHASE AFTER THE GIRL! YOU NERF HEARDER!" Han shoot up straight he sounded frighteningly like Leia when he said that.

"Well _your greatness_ ," Hux growled again, Han's head began to throb harder.....and he didn't even know this kid and he sounded like him. "If your mother sentences me to Death I will make sure I drag you down with me."

"My mother will kill you and I will watch with glee," Ben hissed, "especially she wouldn't want to kill her poor, poor, son." 

Han turned his head slightly. The two men's faces were so close together their noses were touching. It was a scene way too familiar and way too real for Han. Especially fighting was usually how things started between him and Leia.

"FUCK YOU!" Hux yelled.

"Actually it's more like me....fucking you." Ben said a wicked grin forming on his face. It was a smug grin....Han's smug grin. 

And then it happened. Hux grabbed Ben's face and slammed his lips against his as Han horrified as heck looked on. Ben at first stood tense whether it was because he knew his father the man he _resented_ was just feet away watching it or he really hated the man Han didn't quite know. But then Ben brought his hand's to Hux's face growling pushing the redhead against the table.

"Chewie take the controls," Han said. Han was unsteady on his feet as the ship continued to Dodge lazers. "Hey....HEY!!! NO MAKING OUT ON MY SHIP!" Han roared as he pulled both boys apart and pushed them into the booth that surrounded the game table. "Now you two are going to keep quiet for the rest of the ride. Or....I DONT CARE WHAT YOUR MOTHER THINKS ILL JETSET YOU BOTH OUT INTO SPACE!" 

Both men sat silent. Arms folded. Brows furrowed...back to back like two stubborn children as Han unsteadily made his way back to the pilots seat. 

"I hate you," Hux whispered. 

"I know," Ben whispered back.

Han stopped dead in his tracks. Especially because the "I know" thing that he had done to Ben's mother so many times was apparently a thing passed between generation to generation. Han just shook it off and huffed and made his way back to his seat with his head throbbing.

_It's for my wife....it's for my wife_

**Author's Note:**

> Don't be afraid to Send me Prompts [especially since I have high muse for Star Wars] at
> 
> melindarey.tumblr.com


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